going

going going
home
i'm
going
towards that thing
the place that is no longer
that vipers nest
hornet's laughter
the sticky sweet honey
that trapped me
for too long that
hive
of love and anger and that
pattern
that never should have happened
im going
home
she said
inside of you there is an armchair
where if you sit
you are always safe
she said
you worked your whole life
to have that conversation
last night
he said
dad's gone,
we'll all try to pretend its
ok
there's the new baby
the smell of redwoods
the stained sheets
the leaking roof
poverty and wealth and
that endlessly opening refirgerator
home home
this year i pray
it shall find me
while walking the road
towards freedom

Those apologising fools

Those bloody english
they always are apologising
as if they are embarrassed that they are alive
oh so so sorry
pardon me but
oh i'm sorry
for what?
colonialism?

Meanwhile
I keep saying
i will i will
and then i
dont
and then i
re promise
and i
fall
again

takeaway:
failure.

somewhere there's a
child
who was
never able to
forgive

somewhere there's a
woman
who hasn't forgotten

somewhere there's a
promise
of something that they call
Grace

those fools
who so easily
forget
to laugh at
our human
folly

holding you

hold it.
draw the circle.
draw it wide and round.
draw the circle around the self
and don't let it go
find completion here.
and now.
you will not
actually
explode.
hold it
hold the thought temptation desire
now breath.

and let it go
let it go
the thought will come and
the thought will go

just don't
touch
her.